Locker Room Ladies

So I went to the gym today, and while I was unloading my stuff into a locker I got sucked into the most bizarre conversation with two elderly women.  I’m guessing they were in their 70’s?????

naked towel ladyI’ve talked before about the hilarity of the old ladies in the gym locker room.  They just stand around naked and exchange recipes, acting like group nudity in the locker room is the new sewing circle.  And don’t even get me started on their bizarre habits with the hair dryers.  The management at the gym has now put up signs asking that the hair dryers only be used for the hair on your head.  I’ll just let that sink in for a second….

Anyway, this older woman was having a conversation with another woman about thong underwear.  She was explaining to her friend how she prefers to wear thongs.  The other woman was looking at her like she was crazy and basically said, “At our age, why in the hell would want to wear a thong?  Aren’t they uncomfortable?”  And the other woman is going on and on about how you just get used to the discomfort of it.  Then she takes her thong underwear out of her gym bag and starts waving it around and saying, “Look how small they are!”  And they were small.  They had a small triangle of fabric and basically three strings attached to it.  So her friend says, “Why do you even bother to wear underwear then?”  And the other woman looks at me and says, “Well, I bet you wear thong underwear?”

big eyesWTH?  How did I get sucked into this discussion?

So I replied, “Actually, I don’t.  I’ve never been comfortable with the general construction of thong underwear, and I don’t care for how they feel.  I prefer regular underwear.”  And the one woman chimes in, “Me too!  I’ll take panty lines any day rather than have a string up my ass!”

(I’m laughing at the absurdity of having this conversation with two seventy + year old ladies.)

At this point, another woman is listening to the conversation as well.  The woman who wears the thong continues to chat about her preference of intimate apparel while trying to wrench her sports bra over her head.  And then she got stuck.  She’s flailing around, her boobies are bouncing back and forth and she’s basically trapped in her sports bra with her arms stuck over her head.  So the other lady asks her if she needs help, and the two of them have to wrestle this woman out of her bra.

laughing emojiI swear to God, I can’t make this shit up.

As I’m leaving the locker room, I said to the fourth woman who is laughing quietly in front of her locker, “You know it’s a bad day when you get trapped in your underwear at the gym and you need to call for an assist.”

16 thoughts on “Locker Room Ladies

  1. I tried thongs for a month — longest month of my life! Wish I could wear them but I’m not really into anything toching my anus except for the toilet paper wipe! Was that TMI?

    If someone’s drying their pubes with a dryer they might just consider a shave and a haircut instead! I would not be confident enough to blow dry my nether region in a locker room with others.

    The booby thing was funny! Glad someone was there to help her!

    Nice post and just say no to thongs! I’d rather go commando than wear a thong!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I have such mixed emotions on what I think about locker room nudity. On one hand I envy women and teen girls that are totally comfortable being able to walk around the locker room as naked as the day they were born. And I’ve seen lots of that. But on the other hand, I have never been comfortable doing something like that.

    I’m 30 years old and was not required to shower in gym class in junior high or high school. So I never had to shower nude in front of other females.
    You were allowed to shower after gym class if you wanted to. Only a small handful of the girls chose to shower after gym class in junior high. However, about half or more of the girls chose to shower after gym in high school.
    I was so jealous of the girls who had that confidence to shower in front of all of the other girls.

    I have an aunt who I’m really close with who is 41 years old, and she was required to shower in gym class in both junior high and high school.

    I go swimming at a YWCA with my aunt and her daughter once a week. The locker room showers are all out in the open like the ones at school.
    My aunt and my cousin who is 15 years old always shower in the nude after swimming. I always feel so immature standing there showering in my swimsuit while my 15 year old cousin stands there showering in the nude without a care in the world. I assume that even though my cousin is not required to shower in gym class at school, she must have learned her confidence with locker room nudity from her mother?

    My aunt and cousin are always trying to convince me to lose the swimsuit in the showers. My cousin is not the only teen girl that I see in the locker room who is confident enough to shower in the nude. It makes me feel so childish when teen girls who are at what is generally an awkward stage in their lives have more maturity than me.

    My aunt has told me that she was dreading showering in gym class the first few days of the seventh grade, but that by the fourth day of the school year she was already so used to it that it has never bothered her to change or shower in a locker room since. My cousin looks at me like I’m an alien when I tell her that I would feel awkward showering nude in front of other people.

    I work for a small female owned and run company. My boss told us this past week that for Christmas she will be taking the eight of us employees to a Korean spa in December. I have read on Yelp that most if not all Korean spas require total nudity while in the female only sections of the spa.
    I told one of my coworkers that I didn’t know if I’d be comfortable walking around nude in front of all of them and strangers at the spa.
    My coworkers response was pretty similar to how my aunt or cousin would respond. Pretty much shock that it would bother me to be nude in front of other females.

    If anyone has any advice on how I can gain the confidence to be comfortably nude in front of other women, including my boss and coworkers, I’d appreciate any suggestions!

    I think that I will force myself to shower in the nude with my aunt and cousin after we swim this Monday night. Wish me luck!


    • Hi Melissa. Thanks for your comment, and the best advice I can give you is to just do what’s comfortable for you. Don’t worry about what other people think and just take care of your own feelings. If you don’t want to shower in front of strangers or even family, then don’t. You should never have to explain something like that to other people. Also, I would have concerns about a workplace activity taking place at a Korean Spa. Any activity that requires you to be nude in front of your coworkers or boss seriously crosses the line of professionalism. Again, that’s just my opinion, so do what’s best for you! Thanks for reading!


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